The Fifth Horseman: Alberto's Crusade Against Porn

Wednesday, September 21, 2005

 

Alberto's Crusade Against Porn

Well, it seems that, in face of the disastrous Federal response to Hurricane Katrina, the Chickenhawk Brigade has learned its lesson and decided to change its ways. In fact, in anticipation of Hurricane Rita, FEMA has mobilized all of its resources and begun shipping ice to the site....in Maine.

That's right, in a stroke of sheer genius, FEMA has diverted ice intended for the Gulf Coast to Maine. It gets worse, from ABC 25 in Texas:
...the truck drivers Newscenter spoke to said they went all the way down to the Gulf Coast with the ice -- stayed for a few days -- and then were told by FEMA they needed to drive to Maine to store it.

In conclusion, FEMA = still a fucking mess.

This is especially unsettling when considered in context of Hurricane Katrina, which is currently barreling towards the Gulf Coast at a level of Category 4. Let's hope, for the sake of all the people in its path, that the Chickenhawk Brigade has gained some rudimentary intelligence since the Katrina debacle.

But I wouldn't count on it.

In other news, Patrick Leahy is a sellout.

That's right, a sellout. A collaborator. A girly man. It would be nice if, just for once, the Democrats could get their act together and present a unified front on some important issues. Say, the nomination of Chief Justice of the Supreme Court, for example. I am very disappointed in you guys.

In still other news, I bring you a news item that is, at the same time, both terrifying and hilarious: Alberto's War On Porn.

That's right, Alberto Gonzales has declared a War On Porn. Apparently, with the War On Terror completely won, the Chickenhawk Brigade has decided to target its next greatest enemy: Freedom of Speech. From the Washington Post:
The new squad will divert eight agents, a supervisor and assorted support staff to gather evidence against "manufacturers and purveyors" of pornography -- not the kind exploiting children, but the kind that depicts, and is marketed to, consenting adults.

Next on the FBI's agenda: mandatory chastity belts.

If it weren't for the frightening implications this has for Freedom of Speech, this would be completely laughable.

Luckily for Freedom, not all FBI agents are on the same page as their batshit-crazy boss. In fact, several agents, speaking on condition of anonymity, voiced their (often amusing opinion) on Alberto's Crusade. Here are some snippets (source: Washington Post):

"I guess this means we've won the war on terror...we must not need any more resources for espionage"

"I already gave at home."

"Honestly, most of the guys would have to rescue themselves."

It is nice to know that, even in the belly of the beast, some sanity still remains. Perhaps the Universe isn't completely fucked, after all.

Finally, I present you this:

The Impeachment Report

Impeach Bush is still going strong on technorati.com

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Comments:
First, good point, Hurricane Rita and FEMA looks bad, and Patrick Leahy and the Democrats should present a unified front. They will soon!
Secondly, foul language should not be used, overusing it, doesn't make a persuasive argument.

Peace
 
my take on the reason that leahy and the few other democrats voted in favor of roberts was that in the meeting he had with bush, bush assured him that o'connor's replacement would be more moderate, just my hopeful guess.
 
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